Monday, July 11, 2005

Of the color purple and crying with an agenda

I don't know why I thought of these two women today, but I must say, at the time I read them (5-8 years ago), I was in raptures over their thoughts and their writings. I suppose they stand for women's lib and stuff, but to me, in a very personal way, they helped me liberate myself.
The first one is Gloria Steinem, and an essay called "Doing Sixty"..all about growing old in style.

Women on campus
Wear “masculine” thoughts
And look to daddy for Good grades.
Married women
Give their bodies away
And wear their husbands’ Wishes.
Religious women
Cover sinful bodies
And ask redemption from god
Not knowing She is within them.
Dear Goddess: I pray for the courage
To walk naked
At any age.
To wear red and purple,
To be Unladylike, Inappropriate, Scandalous and Incorrect
To the very end.
Here's the second inspiration: Iyanla Vanzant (what a brilliant name!) and her poem, "Yesterday I cried". The poem takes on so much more meaning when you read her book, and the life that wrought this pain. It's depressing as all hell, so I don't recommend it!

Yesterday I Cried
I came home, went straight to my room, sat on the edge of my bed,kicked off my shoes, unhooked my bra,and I had myself a good cry.
I'm telling you,I cried until my nose was running all over the silk blouse I got on sale.
I cried until my ears were hot.
I cried until my head was hurting so badthat I could hardly see the pile of soiled tissues lying on the floor at my feet.
I want you to understand,I had myself a really good cry yesterday.
Yesterday, I cried,for all the days that I was too busy, or too tired, or too mad to cry.
I cried for all the days, and all the ways,and all the times I had dishonored, disrespected, and disconnected my Self from myself,only to have it reflected back to me in the ways others did to methe same things I had already done to myself.
I cried for all the things I had given, only to have them stolen;for all the things I had asked for that had yet to show up;for all the things I had accomplished, only to give them away, to people in circumstances,which left me feeling empty, and battered and plain old used.
I cried because there really does come a time when the only thing left for you to do is cry.
Yesterday, I cried.
I cried because little boys get left by their daddies;and little girls get forgotten by their mommies;and daddies don't know what to do, so they leave;and mommies get left, so they get mad.
I cried because I had a little boy, and because I was a little girl,and because I was a mommy who didn't know what to do,and because I wanted my daddy to be there for me so badly until I ached.
Yesterday, I cried.
I cried because I hurt. I cried because hurt has no place to go except deeper into the pain that caused it in the first place,and when it gets there, the hurt wakes you up.
I cried because it was too late. I cried because it was time.
I cried because my soul knew that I didn't knowthat my soul knew everything I needed to know.
I cried a soulful cry yesterday, and it felt so good.
It felt so very, very bad.
In the midst of my crying, I felt my freedom coming,
Because Yesterday, I cried with an agenda.

9 Comments:

Blogger Parth said...

The poem was brilliant.

9:51 AM  
Blogger . shradha said...

cudn't agree more Parth !!

1:13 PM  
Anonymous Sudha said...

Doing Sixty was great...I could relate to it even. Where do you get these ladki!!!

4:48 PM  
Blogger RTD2 said...

Sudha, glad to see u take a break from your hi-fi job :) And Parth, Shradha I agree too! Btw, I met some amazing people when I worked at Chaitra Leo Burnett one summer in college, one of whom introduced me to Gloria Steinem.And a fellow (ex) Xavierite lent me Iyanla Vanzant.

7:27 PM  
Blogger phucker said...

Wow.

9:45 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

need an update ...
shradha

11:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Makes a good kleenex ad

8:47 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous..That's funny! u should be in advertising! What update, Shradha?
Rt

11:32 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

new post on ur blog honey ;-)
shradha

12:07 PM  

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